<% Response.ExpiresAbsolute = Now() - 1 Response.AddHeader "Cache-Control", "must-revalidate" Response.AddHeader "Cache-Control", "no-cache" %> The Morning Oats - A Bitter Cruel Substitute: Interview with Roger/Smitty

The Morning Oats - A Bitter Cruel Substitute

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Monday, December 6

Interview with Roger/Smitty

FoxieMoxie has requested an interview. So, here are the questions and my replies.

What was it about Horse that made you take the guise of Matt Drudge on Drudge Retort?

http://www.drudge.com/discuss/viewMessage.php/1018

I believe the above link was my first post as Matt Drudge. Matt was spawned thanks to Chaiyah's psychotic rantings...and it was an attempt to f*ck with her, and hopefully to get her to shut up. I figured she was stupid enough to believe that Matt really posted at the website. (ie: http://www.drudge.com/discuss/viewMessage.php/1028). Btw, does anyone remember the "Chaiyah/LightShip" stuff: http://www.drudge.com/discuss/viewMessage.php/1575

She also believed this was really Matt's site, and no one could tell her different. Anyways, after Chaiyah came Horse. Horse was just as annoying, but in a slightly more rational way. So I thought I'd drag out old "Matt" again, and dangle that carrot in front of the Horse. I thought I might be able to use the old "Matt says you can't post for 3 weeks" bit on him, to get him to stop posting for a bit.

I will try to find the Matt/Horse exchange at Drudge, but I'm not having any luck...if anyone finds it and wants to post it, I'd be obliged.

When he seemed to take the bait (hay?) you were obviously pleased. How did you feel when he found out the truth?

When Horse took the bait, I was pretty giddy with laughter - but I wouldn't consider it any sort of great accomplishment. I was pleasantly surprised, as I thought he was a tad saner than Chaiyah, and would have figured this out already. However, I truly enjoyed his reverence for Matt, and his inability to question the truth of random words on the internet. Unfortunately, this led to his discovering cruel.com.

In the middle of the Horse furor, you left the Cruel board. Why? What prompted your welcomed return?

My boyfriend and I split up, so 'real life' intervened and I had no desire to be around cruel.com and have to explain this to 10,000 strangers on a message board. After things cooled down, I just lost interest. I know Horse will be sad to hear that it really had nothing to do with him at all. It just all seemed so trite, that I had no desire to bother with it anymore.

As far as my return - I assure you it will be sporadic. Thanks to the holiday lull here at work, and the end of sailing season, I will be a bit more available than normal. I decided to drop in early this past spring and see what was up at cruel. I was less than pleased the first time I dropped in - seeing that Horse still had his cyber-reigns tight on the board. It looked juvenille. Meta was gone, Peco, RangerX, George Orr, etc... I didn't see any familiar faces, so I didn't log on or post. Eventually, boredom got the best of me. I didn't really want to come back as Smitty and revive the past, so I came back as "Roger_That". Not to be confused with RogerThat, or Roger That.

Please decribe with honesty your feelings for Horse today.

Horse is definitely an anomaly (like was said in that Haiku). I am both repulsed and fascinated with that which is The Horse. On one hand, he is a raving, seemingly lonely, internet obsessed old man who wears wifebeaters and has several cats living in his abode; he seems to need cruel.com to feed his inner ego (and outer ego). Cruel.com seems to be the fuel that feeds his fire...the hamster in his wheel, the slave behind his plow if you will. It's a strange symbiotic relationship, however. In a bizarre way, cruel.com needs him too. Although I am personally on the fence about that. I think if he dissapeared, it wouldn't be all that bad. However, his trite conversation, his ability to bait even the best of us, and the strange and even sometimes wonderful threads he spawns are nothing short of a contribution. I hesitate to preface that with 'good' or 'wonderful'. Horse is a meme. Horse is a plague. Horse is, well, a horse, of course of course.

Ps - not sure what the question about my return to cruel had to do with anything, but what the hell.

40 Comments:

  • Ohh, Smitty, you little brat! I think Foxie meant that he wanted you to inverview for HIS blog. You trying to scoop him, are you? Mean. I may have to give all my dope on Melodie to HIM. You'd better apologize, and it better sound sincere.....

    By Blogger Horseonovich, at 1:29 PM  

  • Horse -

    You aren't paying attention.

    Foxie noted in his comments that we would post this on BOTH OUR BLOGS! duh. Second, I don't email to people at work, so in order for him to get the answers to his questions, I had to POST them here at my blog, or on cruel. Not doing it at cruel.

    I'm not scooping Foxie. I think he'll agree. Besides, I'd be more than happy to delete the entry and let him have all the info to himself.

    You're not getting it Horse - we aren't in competition, we are sharing resources.

    Roger

    By Blogger Horsie Master, at 1:32 PM  

  • What she said.

    By Blogger FoxieMoxie, at 1:37 PM  

  • Hey .... no problem ... just tryint go promote some (un) healthy competition betwixt youse two mugs. Nuff said?

    AS TO THIS: "My boyfriend and I split up, so 'real life' intervened and I had no desire to be around cruel.com and have to explain this to 10,000 strangers on a message board. After things cooled down, I just lost interest. I know Horse will be sad to hear that it really had nothing to do with him at all. "

    I realized it had nothing to do with me, of course, but NOW who's believing what they read on the internet? I used that "I chased Smitty away" line so many times, it became a mantra. I knew it was bullshit, but I said it anyway. Give me some fucking credit, huh?

    By Blogger Horseonovich, at 1:41 PM  

  • Horse, I simply answered Moxie's question. I added in that little niblet for you to take the bait.

    Back atcha'.

    By Blogger Horsie Master, at 1:51 PM  

  • Guess I took more bait then, you mean-spirited nasty-peron, you.........

    (From Gift Horse)

    "The Horse. On one hand, he is a raving, seemingly lonely, internet obsessed old man who wears wifebeaters and has several cats living in his abode; he seems to need cruel.com to feed his inner ego (and outer ego). " - - -

    That was hurtful, Smitty ... boohoo. In the first place, I only have the one cat. Secondly, I am not that old. Third, I wear tanktops when I work out. Fourth (bonus comment), I do NOT spin any more. Fifth, I am a happily satiated man with a good life and have lots of fun here on Cruel as well .... Nuff said? Gosh, you judge so harshly for a civil service fatty.... (kidding, kidding)

    By Blogger Horseonovich, at 1:55 PM  

  • Man Horse, you really took the bait this time!

    Yee Hee!

    you take things too seriously.

    By Blogger Horsie Master, at 2:04 PM  

  • YeeHee indeed.....

    By Blogger Horseonovich, at 2:10 PM  

  • Sorry to hear Roger's boyfriend left her. I guess that is what happens when you are a dried up old hag.

    ~Horse's ass

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:20 PM  

  • Sorry, not taking the bait Horse. Nice try though!

    OUCH.

    By Blogger Horsie Master, at 2:29 PM  

  • Smitty that was NOT me ... Not my style. I like you too much these days (as a FRIEND, of course) to pull shit like that.

    By Blogger Horseonovich, at 3:06 PM  

  • Hmm, the only person I know that used to use the phrase "dried up old hag" was billw. Possibly Gray, but we both know his nuts are dried up old bags.

    By Blogger Horsie Master, at 3:12 PM  

  • While Gray and I are "in solid", bosom buddies, I refer you to the person who posted as being

    ~Horses ass

    (or some such) ... that person is in fact a regular contributor on the board.

    By Blogger Horseonovich, at 3:18 PM  

  • ....COME TO THINK OF IT .....

    I can't help but wonder if Horse's Ass is perhaps Shy's debut post on our board. Well, talk about waxing historical.

    By Blogger Horseonovich, at 3:24 PM  

  • ....COME TO THINK OF IT .....

    I can't help but wonder if Horse's Ass is perhaps Shy's debut post on our board. Well, talk about waxing historical.

    By Blogger Horseonovich, at 3:24 PM  

  • I don't really care.

    Btw, I thought Gray disliked you? It seemed that way per his posted conversation the other day. Especially since he made it up.

    By Blogger Horsie Master, at 3:28 PM  

  • Horse and Roger are falling in love. I think it's beautiful.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:21 PM  

  • I think you're jumping the gun there a wee bit my friend.

    That's not humanely possible. I can't date someone with a mustache who wears wife beaters.

    By Blogger Horsie Master, at 5:01 PM  

  • Roger, stop being so shallow. There are more important things to hate about Horse, other than his appearance.

    Anyway, enough about him. Let's talk about us, Roger. I find myself strangely attracted to you lately. Are you ever in the New Jersey area?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5:15 PM  

  • Yeah, you're right. There are more interesting things to beat Horsey up for than his 'stache.

    No, I don't get to DirtyJerz that often. Is this the HEBE? Sorry, I'm dating someone anyways. And that would break my 'no internet dating' rule.

    By Blogger Horsie Master, at 5:24 PM  

  • No, this isn't the Jew. I'm a long-time poster, but we never say anything to each other. You'd never guess.

    You're probably right about internet dating. Especially from a place called "Cruel." Sorry I brought it up.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5:45 PM  

  • It's me again, Roger. I just wanted to say fuck you for breaking my heart. I wept today while masturbating furiously to your prose.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:15 PM  

  • Sorry for the outburst. Look. Roger, have you given any more thought to the possibility of us getting together sometime?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:35 PM  

  • You scare me.

    By Blogger Horsie Master, at 4:41 PM  

  • Don't be scared. I'm just messin' with you.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:54 PM  

  • Gray didn't post that specifically to annoy Horse. Gray posted it to entertain himself, and, as a byproduct, to (a) annoy Montecore and (b) see who was gullible enough to believe it.

    And who was the leader of the charge, who danced her little feet off? No acknowledgment from you over there on cruel.com that you were played for a fool.

    YeeHee!
    - Your Pal, Gray

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